i realized that i don't know a lot of the motivations behind the things i do. i realized that i attach myself to people because i'm afraid of being alone. and now, here i am, forcibly alone for the first time in my life, and i realized that i'm free.

free.

i don't have to worry about anyone but me. i don't have to be attached to anyone simply because they're attracted to me and i to them. i don't have to be the way i've been.

i don't have to be anything. i don't have to impress anyone. i'm just kate. i will always be kate. and i am capable of feelings, yes i am, and i am capable of love, and hate, and sadness, and joy, and i am capable of controlling those feelings for the first time in my life.

i guess this is what's known as an epiphany.

i don't have to like the things you do. i don't have to dress to get noticed, i don't have to go get drunk. i don't have to smoke. i don't have to be like you. any of you. i don't have to love you, i don't have to like you. i can be alone and happy.

i'm happy right now. for no reason at all. i'm just content with being me. and i don't remember the last time i felt this way. this is a new thing to me, and i am holding on to it with every fiber of my being. i will fight for it. i would die to feel this way. i would die for what i believe.

i believe that i am strong.

i believe that the shit i go through makes me stronger.

i believe that i am worthy of happiness.

i believe that i am worthy.

i believe that i can make something of my life.

i believe that i can be happy for me, and not because of anyone else.

i believe that i can be myself.

i believe that i can be an honest person.

i believe.