i used to dream that someone would sweep me off my feet. then i got older and began to believe that love was a lie imposed by society and the human need for companionship. i want to be proved wrong. i want it so badly. will you be the person to prove me wrong?
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i can't wait to get home. i finally have something to look forward to.
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later:
god, i'm fucking lonely.
maybe someday, things will be better. maybe someday, i'll have someone that doesn't mind holding me. that doesn't mind holding on to me. that wants to keep me.
i shouldn't be writing any of this. but i like to be honest. and this is my only place to be honest. i'm not good at it. not in person. i freeze up, words that form in my brain either getting caught in the filter between my mind and my mouth, or spilling out at exactly the wrong times.
i feel awkward and alone.
i'm hoping that might change soon.
please god, don't let me fuck this up yet.