an idiot, schoolgirlish crush. on a boy that i can't touch. and so now he's the one boy that i'm interested in. and i want to be around him all the time, i want to talk to him constantly, and i can't. because i'm in friend land...and i have to be.

i can't change things. and i can't control that i've got this crush on him. so my current plot is to continue to just be friends with him. because at least i have that, if nothing else. and i can happily do that. i don't want to fuck anyone's life up. so i'm going to sit on my hands. i'm not going to say a word to him.

he won't know.